7 Lessons Learned in the Eleuthera

1. Bahamas Air will lose your flight reservation, without fail. And then you’ll find yourself on Southern Air’s tiny, 18-seat Beech 1900C charter plane on the way to Eleuthera, and then on an even tinier 6-seat Piper Aztec with your wife crying into your shoulder that “we’re gonna die” on the way back.
2. Mini-Hurricanes Aren’t all Bad. Small tropical storms at the start of a vacation only help to make the partly clowdy days following seem comparatively balmy and beautiful.
3. Lenny Kravitz is a sharp dressed man. Shortly after arriving on Eleuthera, our cab driver told us that Kravitz had a house on the island, and that, indeed, he might be there at the same time as us. KravitzThen our vacation buddies, Matt and Sarah (that couple that we always seem to bond with on our trips), ran into Lenny on a deserted beach a couple miles north of our hotel, The Cove. Our envy couldn’t be contained. From that moment forward, we were determined to meet the man, but despite renting a car, visiting all the same spots as Matt and Sarah, and shouting out “Kravitz” at the ocean periodically, nada. At the end of the day, when we’d given up all hope and were boarding a water taxi from Harbour Island back to Eleuthera, Ana started mumbling something. I was totally oblivious for the first and second mumble, but she finally said, through her teeth, “eers lenny kraviiiiz.” At which point I did a double take. He looked just like he does on MTV, respledent in earings, noserings, fro, wrap arounds, and hottie arm candy. In some weird way, it helped validate the whole trip.
4. The famed pink sand beach on Harbour Island isn’t really pink. More of a blush, I’d say. If you look closely at the sand kernels, you’ll see crushed up bits of coral, which gives the sand it’s hue. Is “coral” a color?
5. Andy has weird literary tastes.   Though he didn’t post an official plug in favor of the Chuck Palahniuk book “Survivor,” he loaned me his copy for the vacation and highly urged me to read it. On the plus side, it was a quick, engrossing read; on the other hand, reading about a messianic etiquette expert, who can go on for pages about how to remove fabric stains, was a rather weird beach reading.
6. For some inexplicable reason, iPod nanos appear to be allergic to the Carribean and Mexico. Around the same time Andy was loaning me “Survivor,” he mentioned how his nano had suddenly stopped working on his recent vacation to Mexico. The screen was just dead, and in frustration, he cracked open the case to jimmy with it. Didn’t work. Then, a few days later (back in Philly, I think) it was up and operation again — though not quite as pretty as it was, pre-dismantling. So, when my nano stopped working one day, I got frustrated, fiddled endlessly, but stopped just short of craking the casing. And, wouldn’t ya know, when I got back to NY, it was working again as if nothing had ever been wrong. Still don’t know what caused the problem. Salt water air, maybe? Jobs, are you listening? Any thoughts?
7. The Glass Window is one of the coolest damn things I’ve seen in a while. It’s the thinnest part of Eleuthera — a tiny bridge about two car-widths wide that separates the Carribean and Atlantic waters. On one side is the roiling dark blue ocean, on the other is a stretch of calm acqua. As I understand it, the name comes from sailers, whose ships would be getting tossed around on the violent ocean waters; they would look through the window created by the elevated bridge and the rocky shoals beneath it to see the glassy water on the other side. And, I imagine, say something like “rat bastard.”

By which, of course, they’d be referring to Lenny Kravitz and his arm candy.

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